Separation or divorce advice

RR First Website Article

If you're going through separation or divorce right now, coping with the holidays may have been challenging. Your life is changing anyway, so why not take the opportunity to reinvent it on your terms? This is the perfect time to make some powerful 2016 Resolutions that will put you on the path to happiness and prosperity. Here are ten suggestions for 2016 Resolutions for separated or divorced individuals. Use whichever items apply to your situation, or use it to inspire you to create your own list.

1) Complete your divorce this year. If you've been dragging your heels -­- either hoping for reconciliation or to cause maximum aggravation for your ex -­- it's time to get clear on whether you both want the same thing. If your ex confirms his/her wish to proceed with the divorce, honour it and complete whatever paperwork is outstanding so you can start your new life in this new year.

2) Choose your battles and choose who fights them for you. Resolve not to use your lawyer or the court to try to settle your emotional issues with your ex: it's the most expensive and least effective way to handle these disputes. Although we are both understanding and willing to listen and discuss these issues, your best course of action may be to ask a counsellor or wise friend for assistance in working through emotional issues.

3) Update your will, trusts, insurance policies, and estate plans (if any). Revoke your will by literally tearing it up and making a new one. If your situation is relatively simple, you can make a basic will or living trust using software designed for the purpose; if your situation is more complicated, we would be happy to create these documents for you. Consider: n naming a new executor for your will. n updating your beneficiary designations for life insurance policies and pensions (unless your divorce agreement calls for your ex-­-spouse to remain the beneficiary of these). n naming two powers of attorney: one for medical decisions and one for financial matters. You could designate one person for both roles, or choose two different people based on each individual's knowledge and experience.

4) Meet with a financial expert. Before finalising your divorce, get some objective advice about how to achieve your financial goals from an expert who specialises in divorce issues. If you do not have an independent financial advisor, we would be happy to introduce you to one that best suits your needs.

5) Don't badmouth your ex in front of your kids. At best, you will cause a painful loyalty conflict for them. Instead, encourage your children to love and spend time with their other parent.

6) Never withhold contact or child maintenance to punish your ex. Children of divorce adjust better and are happier if they have frequent, meaningful contact with both parents. Also, child support is more often paid on time and in full when the person paying sees his or her kids frequently.

7) Be cooperative co-­-parents. For instance, try to accommodate reasonable requests to alter the visitation schedule from time to time. Both parents should be welcome, and behave themselves, at the children's milestone events, such as graduations, weddings, and the birth of grandchildren. Children shouldn't fear having their parents in the same room -­- it will ruin their special days and may have a detrimental effect on your

8) Start exercising regularly to banish depression. Exercise triggers your brain to releases endorphins and serotonin, which block feeling pain in your muscles -­- but more importantly, it makes you feel happy. Study after study has shown the emotional benefits of regular exercise which not only treats but can also prevent depression in people of all age groups later in life.

9) Forgive your ex. Forgiveness is as much for the person who grants it as for the person who receives it. If you don't forgive, you will be bound to your ex forever through hatred. Forgiveness will free you; holding a grudge (no matter how justified) will shackle you. You don't have to forget -­- remember the lesson, but forgive and move on.

10) Forgive yourself. It really does take two to tango, and there is something about the breakdown of your marriage for which you need to forgive yourself. If you were blindsided by the divorce, you may have to forgive yourself for ignoring the warning signs.

At Quality Solicitors Rose & Rose we are here to help you. Your past does not equal your future — unless you allow it to. In the past, you and your partner did what you did and said what you said with the resources and emotions you had available to you both at the time.

If either of you could have done it differently, you probably would have done. The truth is neither of you knew or chose any other way at the time.

Divorcing with dignity means there should be no blame. When you are able to view yourself as an individual and no longer someone’s partner, then the process of emotionally divorcing will be complete.

There is life after divorce. As you gain emotional strength each day you will emerge stronger and more resilient.

Quality Solicitors Rose & Rose will provide you with all the advice and support you need to get your life back on track as soon as possible. Our experienced team offers you both cost effective and time efficient legal solutions to the problems that you face. Whatever the problem is that you face, our priority is to ensure that we provide you with a solution that protects you and your interests.

Your details

Please note we are unable to offer legal aid

Message

Fields marked with a * must be completed.

  • We engaged Rose and Rose to recover a bad debt. Their service was excellent and we recovered the full amount plus costs with minimal effort. I have no hesitation in recommending their services and we will certainly use them in the future.
  • Trustworthy and efficient service from this team of friendly and professional solicitors. I would recommend Rose and Rose.
  • Rose and Rose Kingston provided extensive support to me whilst selling my property. We had a number of challenges to overcome but at no point did I feel I did not know what was happening in the process. They are extremely helpful, supportive and explained everything to me in simple terms. In future I will only recommend and use Rose and Rose.
  • We have recommended the services of Rose and Rose many times to either our clients selling properties or their buyers. Every time we have a transaction where they are involved it gives us great reassurance that the deal will be done efficiently, that updates are always available and that the parties involved have a clear understanding of the transaction. Those that we have referred to Rose and Rose have always been extremely happy with the service and have achieved the right end result.
  • Rose and Rose are now officially my favourite and most helpful solicitor.
  • Rose and Rose were exceptional to deal with. Instructed by a buyer of ours they were nothing but helpful and pleasant throughout the transaction, always at the end of the telephone if needed, and as a result of their obvious expertise the sale went through effortlessly. I can highly recommend them.
  • Both my sister and I used Rose and Rose for our conveyancing. We were extremely happy with the service provided, it was professional, friendly and expedient. I would definitely use Rose and Rose in the future.
  • Rose and Rose provided an excellent service when it came to selling our property and buying another. We were able to contact them when needed and we found them approachable and efficient. We would have no hesitation in recommending this solicitor.
  • I have no hesitation in recommending Rose and Rose who acted for me in the sale and purchase of my home.
  • Rose and Rose are the best solicitors that I have dealt with, and the only one I will be dealing with from now on. The professional approach and service they offer is second to none. Their ability to always keep you informed with what is going on has been extremely helpful and given me peace of mind.
  • Rose and Rose recently handled the conveyancing for the sale of our property and we were extremely impressed with the level of service we received. The overall process was quick and efficient. Although these matters can be extremely stressful the staff involved were friendly, thoughtful and approachable yet totally professional throughout. This in effect enabled the sale to proceed relatively smoothly. I would therefore not hesitate to employ the services of Rose and Rose in the future. Robert P
  • Rose and Rose have helped me with conveyancing but also with my divorce and not only have they done a good job, they have ensured my costs have been contained as much as possible. They offer an exceptionally good service and explain the law in plain English, they are very friendly and easy to deal with.
  • Great, helpful advice and support from people who understand what you want and deliver in a straightforward manner in plain English. I highly recommend Rose and Rose Solicitors in Kingston.
  • I have used Rose and Rose Solicitors on a number of occasions and have always found them to be extremely friendly and helpful. They always provide excellent advice and do so in a cost effective manner whilst maintaining an extremely personal service and they really seem to care about you. I would have no problem in recommending their services to any of my friends, family and clients.
  • Rose & Rose Solicitors have a surprisingly refreshing approach to the Law. Whilst obviously highly committed and professional they are relaxed, friendly and approachable making all your dealings with them, in often very difficult circumstances, as stress free as possible. Highly recommend. Rose & Rose is a well rounded solicitors' firm, they have managed to help us through our business legal requirements with their fast, reliable and cost effective service. They have met our demand and need every time. Rose & Rose in Kingston successfully assisted my girlfriend's business in clawing back a large chunk of bad debt that a company were refusing to pay. I was so impressed with the simplicity and ease in which they dealt with the situation that I will use Rose & Rose Solicitors to represent all my own company's legal requirements including employment contracts, conveyancing, dispute resolution, etc. Rose and Rose provide their considerable expertise in a relaxed, friendly and unstuffy way. They have assisted my company and my clients and I would not hesitate to recommend them.
  • We have been involved in a number of sales where Rose and Rose have represented either the buyer or seller and on every occasion they have been a pleasure to deal with. The team make themselves very available and always respond to messages and emails quickly and always seem to be in command of a situation. This is so important to us as we need to keep our customers up to speed at all times. We aspire to delivering excellent service to our customers and they certainly help a great deal in this respect. Our customers who have used Rose and Rose have all been complimentary about the service they have received and how easy everyone there is to deal with.